I have precisely six weeks to get my hands on every marketing survey known to man. Why? Because that is how long I have left in the coveted “18-34″ demographic. I am on the cusp of 35, people. 35! Let’s look back over my adulthood:

  • 10 different addresses (only one of which I owned).
  • 6 crappy office jobs.
  • 14 temporary crappy office jobs.
  • 8 pets, 7 of which are still alive and kicking. And scratching. And barking.
  • 23 different hairstyles, approximately. Including, yes, at least one occurrence of “The Rachel.”
  • 1 country visited.
  • 172 viewings of “Bring It On.”
  • 3 nephews and 1 niece.
  • 42 pair shoes.
  • 28 purses.
  • 1 dear husband.

Man. Those survey people should be knocking down my door! Look at that plethora of life experiences!